Thank you for sharing this. From my experience I think the challenge is not in having strong families, but connecting families for mission. My diocese has a bunch of pious families that truly love God, however they’re disconnected from each other for the most part. Between changing diapers, cleaning houses, and spending time with in-laws, most don’t have enough bandwidth to engage with other families in the parish. Although parishes can help facilitate, it won’t matter if people are too drained at home and don’t show up. I really don’t know an easy solution to this, but something to think about.
There’s so much talk about what we should say that we skip over how we actually show up to people. I’ve noticed in my own life that the invitations I’ve responded to or been drawn toward were never just about information. They were about someone caring enough to listen, to walk with me through confusion and doubt, and to stay present even when the questions were messy. It feels like the Church has always understood that in its rites and sacraments—people come as they are, and encounter grace in a communal space. But translating that into everyday evangelization can be hard. It requires patience, humility, and a willingness to be shaped by others instead of just shaping them. That isn’t an easy posture to take, especially when cultural conversations around faith are so loud and performance‑driven.
In my humble opinion you won’t be able to fix this problem if the priesthood is separated from family. The church took the priesthood out of the home and the home out of the priesthood. There are churches that have figured out this family evangelization strategy and they don’t have this limiting factor. Something to consider.
What do you mean by the Church took the priesthood out of the home and the home out of the priesthood? That sounds interesting but I'm having a hard time understanding.
Good question. What I mean is that from the beginning (Adam, Noah, Israel, Joseph) through the NT apostles (other than Pau - we don’t know what happened to his wife) the priesthood leader lived in the home as the Patriarch and spiritual leader. The wife and children had priesthood privilege under their roof and had a Father with the ability to serve God in both roles (Head of household and Priesthood holder)
With the current (Catholic) setup priesthood holders don’t have families and families don’t have the priesthood. The author is desiring an outcome that is best accomplished under the old system, but IMO very difficult to achieve under the current system. It’s a structural missing link.
Sure, but it seems to me to be a correlation without causation. Is the priest living at the parish not also living in the "home as the Patriarch and spiritual leader"? Isn't the burden of preaching the Gospel on every baptized person, not just the ordained priests? There are about 2,000 baptized Catholics for every priest in the USA right now. Imagine what parishes would look like if every Catholic took seriously their mandate to preach the Gospel and didn't wait for their parish priest to do it for them.
Well No. Patriarch is both Spiritual and temporal Father. Catholic priests do not have families of their own so their priesthood is not in a home, it’s at a parish. That’s my point. Children aren’t being raised with a priesthood leader presiding over the family.
I know what it would look like if Catholics took it more seriously. I’m a Latter Day Saint and every worthy male holds the priesthood and the priesthood carries a larger mandate than membership. Missionary service, lay clergy responsibility, etc. the priesthood demands a greater level of duty than membership and the results reflect this.
There’s a popular business quote that applies here:
You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.
Thank you for sharing this. From my experience I think the challenge is not in having strong families, but connecting families for mission. My diocese has a bunch of pious families that truly love God, however they’re disconnected from each other for the most part. Between changing diapers, cleaning houses, and spending time with in-laws, most don’t have enough bandwidth to engage with other families in the parish. Although parishes can help facilitate, it won’t matter if people are too drained at home and don’t show up. I really don’t know an easy solution to this, but something to think about.
There’s so much talk about what we should say that we skip over how we actually show up to people. I’ve noticed in my own life that the invitations I’ve responded to or been drawn toward were never just about information. They were about someone caring enough to listen, to walk with me through confusion and doubt, and to stay present even when the questions were messy. It feels like the Church has always understood that in its rites and sacraments—people come as they are, and encounter grace in a communal space. But translating that into everyday evangelization can be hard. It requires patience, humility, and a willingness to be shaped by others instead of just shaping them. That isn’t an easy posture to take, especially when cultural conversations around faith are so loud and performance‑driven.
In my humble opinion you won’t be able to fix this problem if the priesthood is separated from family. The church took the priesthood out of the home and the home out of the priesthood. There are churches that have figured out this family evangelization strategy and they don’t have this limiting factor. Something to consider.
What do you mean by the Church took the priesthood out of the home and the home out of the priesthood? That sounds interesting but I'm having a hard time understanding.
Good question. What I mean is that from the beginning (Adam, Noah, Israel, Joseph) through the NT apostles (other than Pau - we don’t know what happened to his wife) the priesthood leader lived in the home as the Patriarch and spiritual leader. The wife and children had priesthood privilege under their roof and had a Father with the ability to serve God in both roles (Head of household and Priesthood holder)
With the current (Catholic) setup priesthood holders don’t have families and families don’t have the priesthood. The author is desiring an outcome that is best accomplished under the old system, but IMO very difficult to achieve under the current system. It’s a structural missing link.
Hope that helps explain my position.
Sure, but it seems to me to be a correlation without causation. Is the priest living at the parish not also living in the "home as the Patriarch and spiritual leader"? Isn't the burden of preaching the Gospel on every baptized person, not just the ordained priests? There are about 2,000 baptized Catholics for every priest in the USA right now. Imagine what parishes would look like if every Catholic took seriously their mandate to preach the Gospel and didn't wait for their parish priest to do it for them.
Well No. Patriarch is both Spiritual and temporal Father. Catholic priests do not have families of their own so their priesthood is not in a home, it’s at a parish. That’s my point. Children aren’t being raised with a priesthood leader presiding over the family.
I know what it would look like if Catholics took it more seriously. I’m a Latter Day Saint and every worthy male holds the priesthood and the priesthood carries a larger mandate than membership. Missionary service, lay clergy responsibility, etc. the priesthood demands a greater level of duty than membership and the results reflect this.
There’s a popular business quote that applies here:
You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.
It’s a systemic issue more than a behavioral one.
Oh, I see. Are you familiar with the Catholic concept of “the priesthood of the baptized” as distinct from the ministerial priesthood?
Not as much as I would like to be. Is this similar to the Protestant concept of priesthood of all believers?